bead ring kit

I like crafts for presents. I get it. I embrace it. There is however, a limit to my appreciation. It was reached last night.

I do not know who got Marissa a "Bead Ring Kit" - but I will find out who you are...and I will buy your daughter a puppy...and a drum set...and an ant farm.

This one ring took us about 4 hours to make. FF-OOO-OOUR hours. In the end, I had to use a needle and thread on it to make it stay together. (That was not in the instructions, by the way. I am just that resourceful...or desperate. Whatever.)

On the bright side - in order to avoid having to help anymore, Allen eagerly jumped at the opportunity to crawl under the house to set mouse traps and Abby volunteered to mop the kitchen.

all my time

For the past year I have been asked on numerous occasions what I am going to do with "all my time" once Rachel starts Kindergarten in the fall. Are you kidding me? I am going to all the same stuff I do now. Drive kids around, bible study, clean, cook, clean, volunteer at school, write grants, clean, schedule appointments, help out at church, clean some more, laundry...

But no, they were not kidding. And more often than not, their actual inquiry was something like, "now that you have 4 hours per week of unallocated, child free, time (aka "all my time"), are you going to look for self fulfillment in a job?"

So let me go on the record saying this:

I love being a stay at home mom. I enjoy being taken care of by my husband. I feel proud when I write "homemaker" in the occupation box on official forms. I do not feel like something is missing. I do not feel less worthy than any other mom or career woman. I feel happy and content with my role in my family and my community.

My husband is on board with my train of thought. He is not one of the "they" that think my life should now include a job. So that is that. I will continue my life in the next year as I did in the past year...

...that was two weeks ago...

Now, I am going back to school. I am finishing my prerequisite classes so that I can apply to the nursing program. What has changed? That's a good question. One I find myself asking hourly, because nothing has changed. Financially, emotionally, husbandly (I love making up words) - everything is the same. I am just as emphatic about my "on the record declaration" as I was two weeks ago.

This is God. This is My Journey. This is what happens when you are willing to let yourself be molded and transformed and led by God. This is what happens when you ask, "God, what's next?" when you say, "Lord, not my will, but Yours be done."

This is exciting. This is equally nauseating. I pray less of me, more of You, Jesus.

So, to answer all of "their" questions:: I will be studying with "all my time."

the schumachers

You know the little old couple from the movie Dirty Dancing? The ones who ended up being the villainous pickpockets? The Schumachers, I think. Yeah, you know who I am talking about. Well, I think they might be living next door to me. Well, not them specifically, but another little, old, frail couple that no one suspects of wrong doing because - well, because they are old and frail. (Just to throw them some props, I will mention here that they just celebrated their 72nd wedding anniversary.)

Why do I think they may have Schumacher-esque tendencies?? Because my dog will not stop barking at them. He has barked at them since the day we brought his furry face home. And since dogs have a keen sense about people, I can only deduce that they are living a secret life and running some elaborate gambling ring out of their basement or something.

Ooooorr...it could be that my dog is crazy.

Actually he has anxiety. So the vet tells me. "Dogs with behavioral problems...blah, blah..." not sure what else he said since I sort of tuned him out because I couldn't believe I was getting "psychiatric" advice for my dog. He suggested that I get some additional, professional help. (Wait...isn't a veterinarian usually considered a professional? Is he suggesting I call The Dog Whisperer?) He also gave me some anti-depressants to try - for the dog not me.

Seriously. This. Dog. Makes. Me. Crazy.

working out...not loving it

It's been a while since I updated on my workout journey. Probably because I hate working out and writing about it makes me think about it, and then I start feeling anxious about the impending workout that will happen today. Right now my stomach is turning and I am sweating. Great. (Maybe if I sweat enough while writing this, that can count as my workout for today...)

Anyway, we finished up P90X about a month ago. I am not going to lie. I am a little (translation: a lot) disappointed with my results. Pretty much my before and after pictures look the same. And no, I won't be posting them. That is just something you cannot un-see. I know I am stronger and my heart and lungs are healthier, but blah, blah, blah - that doesn't translate well to a camera.

Enter INSANITY. I hate it. I don't like to use the word "hate" too often - but I really, really, really dislike this workout so hate seems appropriate. I wished for the power to go out the other night so I didn't have to workout, and I kinda hope my back starts hurting again so I can quit.

One: Shawn T. is not very funny.
Two: Why are his shorts so short? Seriously.
Three: Who invented "mountain climbers?" I do not think I would ever scale a mountain in such a way.
Four: If I am told to get my knees above my waist one more time, I might throw something at the television. Your knees aren't above your waist, Shawn T.!

Mostly I hate it because the workouts are hard, and now that we are half way they are going to get harder. In an effort to end this post on a positive note, I will highlight some of the things I like about INSANITY.

One: The name INSANITY - it's appropriate.
Two: The workouts are short - most less than 45 minutes. Let's get this crazy over with, that's what I'm talking about.
Three: I recover fast. I usually feel like I could go run or pull weeds or something after a workout. I haven't actually done that, but I feel like I could.
Four: Most of the people in the workout video struggle as much as I do. I am especially amused by Tanya's intense/focused/hire-me-I'm-an-actress faces. They are hilarious and they almost make up for the fact that I hate her tiny/toned/never-carried-a-human-in-her-uterus body.

I am hoping that this intense cardio-craziness will yield some results visible by my camera. But in the meantime, I miss Dreya rolls.

p45x

In my head I know that P90X is not a weight loss program - but somehow that does not make me feel better about not losing any weight over the last 45 days. Sure, I am stronger and can jump higher, but I am a visual person. Either the number on the scale needs to go down, or my jeans need to get looser. Neither is happening and I am super annoyed.

stretch x

Finally! A rest day! I am happy to report that my soreness is manageable and I do not wince when I am hugged.

We let the kids stretch with us tonight.

That.was.interesting.

There was lots of falling over and yelping. They were hilarious.

My favorite was a comment by Rachel, my four year old. Speaking about Tony Horton she says, "Hey!!! That's not fair! He's just walking around watching everyone else do all the work!!"

Amen sister. Amen.

p90x - update

Made it through plyometrics without puking. Did not wake up as sore as I thought I would. Guess I am in better shape than I thought? Nope. The soreness really kicked in by the afternoon. Could not lower myself into sitting positions. Plopped down everywhere my butt led.

Have severely increased my water intake from none to some. That counts as severe, right? This has led to more bathroom breaks which has pain implications as well. (See above.)

I squealed involuntarily when a lady hugged me at church. She jumped. Allen laughed. My triceps hurt soooo bad. 

Warming up for last night's workout, I thought I was doing better - until I tried a jumping jack. Got my hands half way up and screamed out in pain. Finished the warm up with my hands on my hips.

Already sick of eggs. It's only day 4. Thinking this is going to be a long 3 months.

p90x - day 1

P90X - day one: Done. Did not puke. But tomorrow is plyometrics, so there is still a pretty good chance...

Took a shower after workout. Could not wash my hair. Held my hands near my ears and rubbed my head on them the best I could. No conditioner. I guess the bands work better than I thought. Total muscle fatigue.

Eating went good. Boy, you sure get to eat a lot of food when none of the calories are bread or candy. Having a hard time reaching my calorie goal. (Those are words I have never said before.)

let the diet begin

December was a hard month...diet wise. Mexico added about 10 pounds to my waistline and Christmas another 5. It is hard to say "no" to free pina coladas. And my mom is a great baker - I think I ate my body weight in cookies during the holidays.

Anyway, time to get back to it. Time to switch from a high carbohydrate with sugar on the side diet to a high protein low carb one. Also time to get moving. Allen and I have decided to tackle P90X again. We did it a couple years ago, but we only made it 60 days. It's crazy intense. But here we go again.

Tomorrow it starts. I am excited and anxious all at once. So tonight, I am going to finish off the ice cream in preparation for my new life. And I wonder why I have diet issues...